I am driven by my own set of rules. You are driven by your own set of rules. Every one of us have plenty and plenty of rules that drive us crazy, or fun loving, or contributing or caring, or happy throughout our life. We did not consciously framed those rules and expect everyone to adhere to those rules.
A rule is our own definition of 'what has to happen in order for us to feel good'. You are expecting your mom to serve the food in certain way. Thats one of your rules. If that is violated, you get annoyed, feel unloved, or feel rejected unconsciously.
You expect someone to smile at you when you say Good Morning. They dont do always. And you get upset. Your rule is violated. We end up creating too many rules and end up ourselves unhappy.
The ultimate truth is that nothing has to happen in order for you to feel good. We need not any reason to be very happy.
Next time, if you are reacting violently to the situations at home or office, or emotionally disturbed for every event that happens, look at what the rule is.
Change the rule and define it in such a way that you always win.
For example, one great rule is "Any time I could smile, Any time I meet people and have fun, Any time I could contribute, Any time I could speak kind words, Any time I create something new, Any time I eat and sleep well for my health, Any time I could reach out to my old friends, Any time......- I feel great and happy".
Define more rules that will always put you in an empowering mode. "Anytime I wake up and find myself alive, I find more day to make a difference". "Anytime I read a book, I am learning something new".
What does your rule book say?